Weekend was ok, it could've been better I guess. After the C conversation/sprained ankle incident, I've been a little crusty. My kitchen is coming along nicely and I'm really pleased with how much is getting done. Mary & Howard have been a life saver!
I spent Saturday night trying NOT to be pissed at Chance and picking on Kristen's little brother. We are relentless to the poor boy, but he was a mean-spirited little child and karma would dictate that perhaps that might come back to him. We are MUCH kinder in our play then he ever was to us, plus this has more to do with the fact that he used to call me "Pizza Butt Face" when I was a very sensitive and vulnerable 14 year old. I vowed then to make sure I got back at him, which I did on Saturday night by spraying him with the hose and throwing popcorn at him which stuck quite well to a slightly soggy JR. So there, ha. Plus, I hung out with Carol a good portion of the night (Kristen's Mom) and learned all about her family, how cool was that? Her dad was a WWII fighter pilot! Neat stories.
Anyway, Sunday we got a ton of work done on the house. It's safe to say that 'we are almost done.' Fabbbahulous! I'm looking forward to having my kitchen/life back, but it's going to be such a beautiful new kitchen/life....I already feel it.
Today, I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed. Unfortunately, some people don't always do what they say they will and when that happens...it often can effect others in a considerable manner. I cannot find it within me to be hateful toward anyone, but I am, if nothing else, extremely disappointed. And angry. Yes. Very. I have a child to feed, I am a single working mother now trying to pay a mortgage on one income. This entire scenario has cost me quite a lot and on every level possible, from emotional to financial. More so in the financial now it seems. I am angry that this somehow doesn't concern the other person involved here, that it is now every man for himself in spite of the numerous times I have bailed him out of scenarios, co-signed my life away so he could buy that stupid f*cking bike and worked my ass off so that my credit was in good shape, which inevitably ended up benefiting him quite nicely. I've been more than patient, more than kind and more than loving. I have nothing left to give and I no longer can tolerate this passive attitude towards following up with responsibilities. I am done being generous, there just comes a point where you have to say "NO!" and I've met that limit. I'd met it a long time ago.
It's very sad, I never thought I'd have to go this route with him. And all I can thinking of is how badly I want this issue to be resolved so I can pay the mortgage, get the bills on track and get on with my life. Why must it be drawn out for weeks, months? All it seems like is an effort to some how maintain control of the situation...I don't know? Again, I never thought this would be how things would end between us, it's really a bummer to me.
This too, shall pass.
Song for the day: Garbage - Special
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