Today is better, though my dreams are still difficult and weighing on me. I'm having alot of dreams about death, I know death in dreams can represent rebirth or any number of big changes in your life and that would make perfect sense with my current state of mind.
I think I also feel a little better because I am getting a plan into action about how to proceed and it's going to mean working long hours, taking a huge hit in both the amount of time I have with my son on a regular basis and my long term financial stability, but it's what must be done or my house will go bye bye and Max and I can't be in that position. It is true, that life does in fact catch up with you and those you allow in your life and the choices you make along the way can have long term affects you may not be able to anticipate at the time. It's the chance you take I guess. Live, learn, grow.
And not looking back I suppose because it's not going to change a thing. Let it go, forgive. I cannot change decisions that have been made or the actions of others, I can only begin to work to rectify them.
Besides, Crystal will be here in about 24 hours so that's hard not to get excited about ;)
xo ya'll, till next time.
S
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