Torture For Fun?

Max and I have dentist appointments in early February. I despise the Dentist. I despise it even more than getting a pap smear. I mean, I really dislike the process.

The sounds, the scratching and tugging and pulling. And wouldn't you just know it....I have the biggest mouth in the world, but because my jaw line is so strong and defined there isn't a whole lot of room in their for hands, thus my jaws generally ache after an exam.

Ever heard of scaling? Google "Scaling Procedures" I like how the descriptions are so perky sounding, like folks are just lining up to get their gums peeled. I have to get my teeth scaled once a year. Something about calculus build up or some such dental term that escapes me. It's totally horrendous. I have to bring music, they tried to give me nitrous last time (to make it less painful) and it made me very ill. I had to put it off another week, which means more waiting and more anxiety. I cannot eat for at least 3 days afterward and my mouth aches, like someone ripped barb wire through it. Anything cold or warm to drink, hurts. So kids, take care of your gums or else you'll end up in the hot seat on this one.

I won't lie and pretend I floss alot, because I'm pretty bad about it...I just don't like hands in my mouth. But I do brush and rinse alot, so my teeth are in good shape over all. Except the calculus build up. That part is a drag.

And poor Max, he inherited his fathers teeth which are truly terrible. I feel bad for him only b/c I imagine my dentistry nightmares will pale in comparison to his. Poor kid:( Good thing he's not a big baby like me, I can handle almost any kind of pain...but this for me is almost unbearable. Oh yes and I'm taking up a collection fund for Max's braces. Wanna know how much they cost these days? HA...and he thinks he's getting a car......shhyyeeeeeeeeah....and monkeys will fly out of my butt!

Apparently, there IS profit in needless torture.

I know I shouldn't be complaining, I mean the world is filled with people who cannot afford or do not have access to any kind of dental care. That's terrible, everyone has the right quality health care of every kind. I'll try to think of this when my nerves are exposed and I can't move and their is a stranger leaning over me and breathing all over me. blech.