I crawled up the spout last week and the rain came and crashed me down, but this week I’m attempting the spout again, not nearly as blindly or terrified as last time. Regardless, the past few weeks have reminded me that I am an emotional eater and when: emotional eating + hormones = ravenous, insatiable Sarah. Luckily, I am more on track these past few days so I am feeling better today, but man I must’ve put down more than a grown man last week. Speaking of grown men and eating, Dave can eat. I tell you, he eats like Max and he’s got 20 years on the kid. It must SUCK to have that metabolism. *glare* Sometimes I find myself jealously sneaking glances at him as he eats whatever and whenever, wondering what that must be like. On the bad days, the days when I want to scarf down a jar of peanut butter using a chocolate bar as the spoon…well those are the days I remember that this body was designed to be curvy and voluptuous and that I have a different body for a reason and I can indulge the beauty of woman hood and that’s a good thing. So what if it means I can’t eat like that, I’m not supposed to. I don’t have a physical job; I don’t need all those calories to sustain myself. Besides, I’d like to see HIM pop a baby out of his bod, that’s something I could (in theory) do that he could never do. Well, maybe a food baby maybe..haha. I am also trying to figure out a way to let him know my concerns about WHAT he eats, namely soda. He consumes gallons of soda a week. I keep trying to tell him that just b/c he’s a big tall guy with the metabolism of a 17 year old boy, that doesn’t mean he’s healthy and soda is SO SO SO nasty. It’s just wrong and he has to give that habit up ASAP. As a former soda addict, I KNOW how hard it is to give stuff up, but it must be done. It’s so detrimental to your body, just icky and wrong. He listens and nods and smiles and then shows up with a gallon sized jug of Pepsi from the convenient store. I could just shake him.
Back to topic, last weeks production build wasn’t as smooth as I would have liked, but it wasn’t really anything I could control. The project managers did a piss poor job of making sure their issues were ready to be moved to production and just waved their hands at me when I tried to verify with them what projects files should be moved to production and I now see why my boss didn’t baby sit the process. She was trying to show these guys that they need to do a better job of approving what issues go to production. I was reassured many times it wasn’t my *fault* which I didn’t feel it was anyway, but hey…we all like reassurance right? Especially when stumbling your way through a high learning curve. So, I’m feeling pretty good about things, though I have days that I’m a little more overwhelmed than others.
In Bailey news, we had our first electronic causality last night. A power supply cord for my laptop. My WORK laptop. The same laptop that they just replaced that same external battery pack oh about….3 months ago. Guess who gets to buy a new one for work. YAY Bailey, awesome. In her defense, it was my stupid fault for leaving it on the floor. Though in MY defense she’s never really chewed on power cords so I had no reason to suspect her. That’s the awesome thing about puppies and baby’s; they sure know how to keep interesting!
Mom is settling into her new apartment well, it’s a cute place. Very manageable for her physically, financially, etc…it’s a good fit. She had St. Paddy’s day feast at my house Fri night and then Dave and I went over there on Sunday and hung pictures and brought her the bed I gave her. I made up the bed for her and had all her pictures and knick knacks hung up in no time flat. In a fleeting moment of vulnerability, she admitted to me that she now sees how I’ve been playing the mother all these years and I saw some teary eyes. Wow. Perhaps this time to herself will shed some light on a lot of underlying things. She is leaning on me obviously, because she needs me right now and that’s ok, I expected it, but I will say that she’s been pleasantly surprising in her respecting of my own space and boundaries as well. Good on her.
Well, this little spider has to get a move on. I have a kazillion chores to do at home and I have to take Bailey on a walk, it’s just TO beautiful not to today. She’ll love it! Till next time, xo.
No comments:
Post a Comment