It Lives....It LIVES!!!!!

I am happy to report that today feels a much brighter and softer day compared to yesterdays darker and harsher coldness. I really am a sensitive little bird, not only to my own emotions and internal shifts but also very much so to those of others. Like everything, there is a balance to this. Aspects of my sensitivity and intuitiveness that are greatly appreciated and days where I wish my feelers didn't get tickled so easily. Ah well, such is the world of the Aquaria female. See her scurry and scamper!!!

I slept about 11 hours last night, there is such a thing as too much sleep and in my normal schedule this would be too much sleep. But the past 4 weeks have been anything but "normal." Actually, I'd find it hard to describe any of my days as "normal"...but normal is relative, like all things. Moving on.

I woke up this morning still reluctant to get moving as I really like being warm and cuddling Chance in our bed, except this morning he had all pillows sans the one I was using covering his head and had managed to mummify himself with the comforter in his sleep. He wasn't exactly available for snuggling. So I bounced up and got into the shower and carefully took notice of my poor body that I've been abusing off and on my whole life in some manner or another and looked at my tubby little tummy and vowed to make changes in how I treat and view my body and self. In exactly 20 days I will turn 30 years old. Farther in life than I had ever expected to make it and many of the things I once desired so greatly have found me some how. If in the past I had not been able to take heed to gifts given to me, no time like the present to get on board with the idea of appreciating this life even one degree more.

I've been binging on food for about 2 days straight, the kind that makes me sick to think of and also the very kind that damages your pancreas, liver and kidney in the same ways as drinking to much alcohol. Self medication of one form or another it seems, I really am a pro at comforting myself in the most detrimental manner. Again it's all relative and for me, the change needs to come in finding the balance in myself within daily life but also when big changes occur. Though, I will give myself permission to acknowledge that the past several months have been full of the kind of changes that would throw any one off kilter at least a little. But I am ready to bounce back and find the balance again. Apparently, the theme of this blogg should be "balance"...moreover, perhaps the theme of this year will be Balance. Indeed.

Max and I are eager to get his room organized, his is sort of the last one to get into "functional" mode. I feel terrible that he's been sleeping on the couch, but he's been gone for some time and only been home a few days since we moved in really. He commented last night that he didn't feel the house was really ours just yet. I know how feels. Sometimes when I get into bed I feel like I am staying at a hotel, a very comfortable hotel with my belongings strewn about. I told him it will take time to feel like it is "ours", but rest assured...it is in fact our house and we aren't going any where for a while. He laughed and said he hoped not. That made me smile given his behavior of the past weeks, perhaps he likes the idea of life with Mom after all? I hope so.

Mary & Howard have some furniture for us, which is a life saver at this point since we have very little...well, very little that want in the new house. Most of what he have looks sort of trashy and tacky in the New House. Neither C nor I have bought new furniture in many many MANY years. So now we'll have an actual bedroom set!!! SCORE!

In reading the bloggs of my fellow bloggers and friends, it seems there is a general shift for all of us. Perhaps it is a sign of things to come. It certainly seems a more positive direction than I've seen for quite some time and it pleases me tremendously to see my fellow females finding personal growth, health and happiness. Yay us!. We've all grown older and wiser and maybe are learning the value of caring for ourselves first so we can be better friends to one another....???? Things that make you go hmmmm.

And finally, my site recommendation of the day is:
http://www.wickedsunshine.com/WagePeace

For me, this site provides and outlet of humor in conjunction with the idea's many of us share about our current government, the war in Iraq and human rights. My particular favorites are:
"The Presidents Prayer"
"Start A Revolution, Stop Hating Your Body!"
"United States Of Texas"

Work beckons....more to come.