I am quickly loosing my patience with some of the women in my life who claim to love me; yet they continue to lie, belittle or attempt to manipulate me.
I am drawing the line. No more drama.
I do not know what form this will take, if it means I must remove you from my life, I will not hesitate. It is not my desire to do so, but I will feel no remorse in taking a stance that not only honors my own mental health, but that of my family as well.
It angers me that I've allowed this abuse to go on for so long, I am the one that must reconcile that anger with myself and I won't allow it to cast bitterness unto my heart. In the interim, I have the power to say no more and move on.
If you can approach me with integrity, honesty and be forthcoming, without motive; I am open. But the blatant lies, the condescending remarks, the attempts to control me or will me to do as you please for your own benefit is no longer something I wish to engage in. I am the fool for allowing it to occur for so long without defending myself or the needs of my family, I guess it is my very idealism that often causes my blindness. Again, this is something I must reconcile within me and I do not lay blame unto others for the past, but I have the choice now to make different decisions about how I allow others to treat me and let the chips fall where they may.
For me, one of the most painful aspects of this issue is that this comes from the women in my life who are supposed to be of support and unconditional love, there is so much power and strength in feminine union and these sources choose not to acknowledge that power, only fight against it and disrespect it. It is a betrayal and I it hurts my heart to acknowledge that it is real.
We all learn lessons about boundaries in our life time. I realize that others are often not intentional in their behaviors. I am not an unkind person and I would never turn someone away if they truly needed me, but we all also have personal rights. I am choosing to honor my own personal rights, something I've not done for far too long.
I feel a tremendous weight removed, just be releasing this energy. I do not wish to wallow in this frustration all day and this is why I must release it, to move forward and empower my own decisions.
Blessed be all, I hope this Wednesday finds you all in glorious harmony with your surroundings and your loved ones and YOUR SELF.
3 comments:
Well this is ironic. We just learned about similar things in my class today. Basically take care of yourself and love yourself before you can do that for others.
Hugs to the Sweet Sarah!!!
(Lets try that again) ;)
Don't let anyone tear you down, Babe. Especially not anyone that calls themself a friend to you.
There is so much I would add, but let me just say I know how you feel.
"A little simplification would be the first step toward rational living, I think." ~Eleanor Roosevelt.
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